Instaglutton

Instagram...

Fran_freaky19: New nail polish I'm trying out today #midnightpassion #nails #covergirl #MaybeIAmBornWothIt #fresh
 
 
 

45 seconds later, a new, but slightly different post...
 


Fran_freaky19: goodnight everyone xoxox #kisses #naturalbeauty #love #midnightpassion 

The Generator


When you post an image such as the one above,  and friends start posting to your page what their results were.
 
 
TimnEricFreaks: Wonder Raptor, The Victor of the Past
AlfonsoSoriano: Captain Phantom, The Guardian of the Gauntlet
Giggles1989: Time Solider, The Sacred of the Seven


The Second Party Bad Angle

 
This angled shot is either taken by a parent who doesn't know better, an older person who doesn't know better, or some enraged revengeful asshole. 

The Attention Graber

"My hair is getting so long!"
 
Yeah, I noticed that! Oh, and your tits.

The Overreacted

FRIEND RANT:
Fran Smitherhouse: UGGGHHH I just spoke to the biggest asshole on the phone! Whatever you do, DO NOT go to the dentist on King Street. The receptionist is the biggest f$%*#^$  a$$h*&@# c#*^ you will ever see!!!!!!!!!!!! I called to make an appointment but never confirmed and now someone else has that slot. Such a f*&^%@* pig slut.





Every person who reads it:

The Gam Cam


                             
 
 Cool! Or, if this seems more natural, neat!  

The Morning Hello

"Good Morning!"
 
Yes, good morning to you as well! So umm... I don't know how to say this, but, well, did someone murder your vagina last night? I ask because I just don't get why you are doing this.

Old School Facestalk

 
 
One of my earliest photos I posted after joining Facebook was the kind of picture I would not have posted today, just a bad look -think late MySpace.
 
Recently, a man "Liked" the photo, leading me to speculate that he clicked-through hundreds of images until he found this one, which was resting comfortably and untouched in my "Mobile Uploads."
 
 I am not judging, as most of us have been there, but the lesson here is: if you are attempting subtlety don't "Like" the image. If you want me to know you're doing it, click away.  

The Working Man

 
Not douchey, just confusing. You want us to like a photo of you doing your job? I definitely will if that's the case. 

Vacation Shot


"Vacation." 

Listen dude, we know you're wasted, listening to your iPhone and falling in and out of sleep. That's fine, just realize that we all know that book will not be touched. 

The Unnecessary Gym Pic Part Two



        


Quote Posts

"My mood right now."
 
 
Thank you for the inspiration Faulkner.

The Gas Guzzler

"Uggh this is UNBELIEVABLE!!"


Aaaaaaaaannnd no one gives a fuck. 

Song Choice

"So good!"


Yeah, we know. Now go back to your "Family Fued" show and watch as Steve Harvey's suit gets bigger before your eyes. 

The Bar View

There are two types of people out there: the person who posts the "beer on bar picture, " or their counterpart, the "hand holding the Starbucks cup" person.


Tis the Season

As we approach the fall season, you will most definitely see a #throwback photo accompanied with the phrase, "Winter is coming."

The Freak in the Sheets

Question: Going to bed, whose with me?
Answer: No one.
 

Landscapes


#shrub
 
 
Yep.
 

The Waiting Game



 
1. Subject posts picture/status.  



 
 
2. Subject waits for someone to comment or like post.




3. Subject gets excited for one like. 
 
 
 
4. Subject continues to wait for more people to "Like" their update.

Moon Shadow

"Super moon."


 
This image is almost as bad as the shitty firework picture you posted three weeks ago.

Wardrobe Assistance

Should I wear this today? 
What tends to be the most annoying part about posts such as this is that, even if all of your friends posted, "NOOO DON'T!!!!!" you would definitely still wear it. 

Humble Brag


 
Just got done running a 5k #blessed 

The Basting Drumsticks

I know you're trying to be sexy or show that you're relaxing but all I can see are turkey drumsticks. 


Oh another one! I see you're having a great vacation!
 Yep, still turkey legs. 

The Drone Shot

What angle was this taken from? I have seen you in real life and I've never seen this woman before. 

The Boner Killer

My dream ring ;)

Asking For It

Who wants to cuddle tonight? ;)

Also know as: Who would like to have sex with me? Oh you would? Well, I posted this picture to see if anyone's dick would move. Now that I know it's working, I'm going lay in bed, check how many people are responding,  not answer them if they do, and post another one tomorrow night because my college gay best friend favorited the post on Twitter. Nighty night ;)
 

Selfies in Weird Locations

Porto potty?

 
 
 
 
 
Closet?
 
 
 
 
 
Weird.

InstaFresh Faced

As seen on Instagram :
#nomakeupandIdontcare
#nofilter

It was really brave of you  not putting makeup on today. Thank you for your courageousness. 

The I Kind of Get it?

"Thanks for the flowers...NOT!"
 
 
The person who is trying to be funny but just looks like a condescending ass.


The Charades Friend Part 1


"So excited to see my favorite comedian Sinbad next month!!" 

This is the friend that has to inform you on what emotion they are feeling and then takes a picture of it. 



"Smells like stinky roses, yuck!"

The "This is a joke, right?" Post

Omg I need a new nose stat!! 



The T-Rex


 Where the fuck did your arms go????!

The Bad Guess




 
 



Fran Smitherhouse
 
    3 hours ago near Rome, NY



 
 
 
 
Does anyone know what this is? It's by my back stairs. 

 
5 Likes     Comment     Share

Tom Kilz: An Oak tree.
3 hours ago
Sarah Sloptino: I have that in my backyard too. Its definitely a rose bush <3
2 hours ago
Peter Hynes: tomato plant
1 hour ago
Nigel Loosefoot: pot
33 minutes ago
Quincy Immajumpyavagina Davis: Celery
5 minutes  ago